YOUR.JULIET - Retrospect

You Gotta Be You gotta be bad, you gotta be bold, you gotta be wiser You gotta hard, you gotta be tough, you gotta be stronger You gotta be cool, you gotta be calm, you gotta stay together. All I know, all I know Love will save the day

It's been a long long time since I last blogged. I wonder who will still visit a deserted blog like mine. hahaha. Well, I'm too busy to blog these days and I also don't come online very often. I will have to blame my faulty computer for this. But now I'm smart enough to bring back the school laptop to use! muahaha.

It's actually quite tiring to wake up early in the morning for five days in a week. But surprisingly, time really passed very quickly in school. And you will find yourself leaving the school at 6 plus 7pm, feeling like you have not done alot of things for the one whole day. So, my new job is not that easy also, considering I have to reach the school before 7.30am and always leaving the school at 6 plus 7pm. Some more the day itself can get worse if you encounter horrible students who just pissed you off totally. So, in this case, optimism is necessary to continue to survive. But then there are also students who will definitely make your heart whole again. Their innocence, obedience and cuteness will be able to help you last for the entire week :)

7:45 AM;
in retrospect

SALE SALE SALE

"These are all our regular items but for robinson card member you'll enjoy a 20% discount." That is what I kept repeating for the past two days. I guess people really like sales alot! For example when i say the usual price for this particular dress is $199 but now is only $59. And on top of that you will get another 20% discount if you have the robinson card. So, normally after I said this, customers will automatically buy! hahaha simply because the sales is really too irresistible! And is really too wu hua already! hahaha. So, I finally understand why I like sales alot too! hahaha. Another typical trait of us is that we like cheap and new stuffs. People always want brand new pieces. But too bad sales items are all on display. hahaha. But then I always have a sense of satisfaction when I manage to get a new piece for customers although the store room for new pieces is like damn far! This is because I want to have new pieces too when I buy clothes! hahaha. So, please give me new pieces next time when I ask for them. hahaha.

But now I'm damn sad lol! I just bought a black skirt from my counter. You know what, I shop while I'm working. So, if I like the shirt or skirt, I will just keep them in a drawer then my mum will help me to make payment later. Isn't it brilliant? hahaha. But then I'm so sad now because the skirt I just bought which I really like it alot has a flaw! And the flaw is a tear somewhere near the zip. I shouldn't have told my mother because I know better than anyone else that the skirt I bought is the last piece and I would not be able to get an exchange for a perfect one. And now they ask me to refund! That means I will get back the full sum of money my mum paid but no more skirt! HOW SAD?! So sometimes ignorance can be blissful. At least I'll be able to keep the skirt but just that I don't know I can keep it for how long. I'm so sad! :(

7:53 AM;
in retrospect

Merry, Merry Christmas!

I'm so lazy to blog these days. Actually is not just plain lazy but also because of my failing computer. I kept experiencing network down for the past 1 week. But thankfully my uncle came to my place to help me with it. If not I would have a sad sad christmas. hahaha. And I'm also too broke to buy a new computer now. Lol. So I better take good care of my ageing computer from now till next year when I feel rich enough to buy myself a laptop. Anyway, I'm starting to work as a sales girl at centre point starting from next tues onwards. So people if got time remember to come visit me and not disturb okay? hahaha. Now I'm waiting to shu's place for a steamboat feast! hahaha. We shall wreck havoc and party all night at her place! hahaha.

10:57 PM;
in retrospect

Where have all the jobs gone?
I seriously need a job, I need money urgently but then I also don't know what I need to use the money for. But still I really feel broke. I know why I need to find job so badly unlike others who can spend all they want and finding a job is the last thing they would do. That is because I don't have rich parents or rich boyfriend. hahaha. Sounds so materialistic right? But I guess I need to be realistic, there is no paradise. I really think I've become more cynical nowadays.
I really really want to be free. Although there are no more examinations for the moment, I can't feel that I'm totally free. Somehow, something is suffocating and preventing me from getting the freedom and happiness I want. I don't want to be restricted to do things that sound right. I just want to be happy. But apparently, I can't for some strange reasons I really can't.
I just want to get away but provided you let me go. I just want to continue without you. Somehow, you doesn't really make a difference to me now. I really don't wish to be tied down for no reason and I'm really not happy with my life now. I just want to get away myself.

5:39 AM;
in retrospect

Too much words to say, too much time to waste.

I used to lose focus while i was studying, thinking about what to do after A levels. There seem to be many things I want to do. There are some things I held back for very long, so now is time to unleash them and give them a nice ending. It is not very good to suspend them in the air halfway and nowhere. And I guess I can't really move on with that "thorn" in my heart. But how am I going to do about that? thinking
The most important thing to do is to recontact my old friends. We seemed to lose contacts already. But someone will have to initiate and maintain the relationship and that shall be me! It's quite sad to have lesser friends when I grow older. So, since I have the time I will take the initiative.
Next, I need a job! I need money to buy clothes, go overseas and also save for uni!
I have a dream now! It 's time to make initiatives to take a step closer and realise my dream!

9:52 PM;
in retrospect

It's 2:10 now. And I just cannot sleep. I kept turning and tossing around until I was so fed up with myself. So I get up and come online again. I need someone to talk to. But I couldn't find anyone. So, I can only blog. There's something wrong with me but I don't know what. Nobody can help me, I'm on my own.

11:16 AM;
in retrospect

I'm totally bored now. Suddenly, I feel that I've lots of time to waste although in fact it is not true. But I just cannot get myself to study now. I wonder how my classmates can pick up the momentum to mug again when the mood of playing still lingers. I've promised myself to get started after tomorrow. After tomorrow which is monday, we will be back in school again, facing the grades we are getting and I believe that is enough to knock some sense in me to get me going again. But now I only feel like doing nothing and waste life.

Sometimes have is equivalent of not having.

8:30 AM;
in retrospect

Here I am blogging again. Life has been great these few days. No mugging for me, I just need to take a break and catch up on what I've missed the past few weeks. But all these fun and simple activities are just temporary. As I have said earlier, they are rewards after a stressful period. And very soon, I'll be burying myself in notes and tys again. I cannot be completely free until 17 november. By then, I will have all the time to blog and doing all the simple things in life EVERYDAY, do until I'm sick of them. It's not far away from now, in fact it's near. It's just another 8 weeks from now. So, everything shall remain as it is and no one should be affected by anyone as nobody has the right to affect the person who is taking the A's.

7:35 AM;
in retrospect